Getting Past "No"

“Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way.” [Daniele Vare, Italian diplomat] We may not realize it, but to make decisions in our personal and professional lives we often use negotiation techniques. In many of our important decisions — those that have the greatest impact on our performance at work and your satisfaction at home — most of us need to reach out to others and negotiate. Experienced negotiators learn to focus on issues rather than harden on positions, and in so doing they engage in joint problem solving. In Getting to Yes, Roger Fisher and William Ury of the Harvard Negotiation Process say the definition of wise agreement is “one that meets the legitimate interests of each side to the extent possible, resolves conflicting interests fairly, is durable, and takes community interests into account.” When we're operating under normal circumstances, these kinds of negotiations work well....

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